Virtual Tophet Josephine (yes, yes, interest declared, etc.) has decided that the quiz everyone’s taking is too skewed to an American audience, and has augmented and adapted the existing lists…
So, here goes:
1. Cats or Dogs? Cats
2. Elizabeth Taylor or Richard Burton? Neither
3. Royal Opera or ENO? I’ve seen better stuff at the ROH.
4. Ancient or Medieval? Late Antique.
5. Titian or Caravaggio? Caravaggio, just.
6. Yeats or Eliot? Yeats.
7. Bruce Forsyth or Larry Grayson? Oh, Christ….
8. George or Ringo? George.
9. To Have and Have Not or Casablanca? Casablanca
10. Tracey Emin or Rachel Whiteread? The latter.
11. The Who or the Stones? The former
12. Dylan Thomas or Ted Hughes? Dylan Thomas
13. Robinson Crusoe or King Solomon’s Mines? Haven’t read the latter, like the former.
14. Fellini or Begnini? You can’t be serious. The former’s a genius, the latter a criminal.
15. Dostoyevsky or Tolstoy? D.
16. Oxford or Cambridge? O.
17. The sixties or the seventies? 70s (just because it annoys so many people. OK: there are other reasons too)
18. Burger King or MacDonalds? BK
19. Jonathan Ross or Angus Deayton? AD
20. Peter Mandelson or Alastair Campbell? !! Good timing: AC, but they’re both odious.
21. Verdi or Wagner? Verdi
22. Duran Duran or Spandau Ballet? Duran Duran, for “Hungry Like A Wolf”
23. Bill Monroe or Johnny Cash? I only take Cash.
24. The Iliad or the Odyssey? Iliad.
25. Hello or Heat? Heat
26. London or Paris? London
27. Moscow or California? Moscow. (But see below)
28. Athens or Rome? Rome
29. Red wine or white? Red
30. Noï¿½l Coward or Oscar Wilde? Wilde
31. Vanessa Redgrave or Judi Dench? Hmm. Dench, probably, but haven’t seen much of either.
32. Brown or Blair? Brown
33. British Museum or Natural History Museum? BM
34. More museums: Louvre or Pergamon? Haven’t been to Berlin, so Louvre.
35. Pubs or bars? Pubs. Even pubs in which people smoke.
36. Comedy or tragedy? Comedy
37. Fall or spring? Autumn (shit: Pollard made this joke too. I must be crap.)
38. Coffee or tea? Coffee
39. Jane Austen or Virginia Woolf? Austen
40. Bull-fighters or gladiators? !!! Bull-leapers, -wrestlers or -shitters, please.
41. Renaissance or Enlightenment? Enlightenment, of course.
42. Sunset or sunrise? Sunset.
43. Town or Country? Town.
44. Mac or PC? Mac.
45. Charles or Diana? Is this for “first up against the wall”? (Well, that was Diana…)
46. Tuscany or Provence? Tuscany
47. Email or Telephone? Email, email, a hundredfold email.
48. Fruit or Cake? The Ship of Fools Fruitcake Zone.
49. Football or Rugby? Rugby Football. The kind played by the Rugby Football Union, to be precise.
50. Dolphins or Tuna? Dolphins.