Archive for March, 2004

Thinking of Irishmen…

March 6th, 2004

Not much from me today. But I thought I’d introduce a new feature to the Virtual Stoa, which will allow me effortlessly to fill space on those days when I don’t have anything to say and there aren’t any dead socialists.

So here’s the first instalment of a blog serialisation of Great Dead Irish Socialist Oscar Wilde’s classic essay, “The Soul of Man Under Socialism”, which not nearly enough people appear to me to have read. I’ll post the rest of the text in bite-sized chunks over the next few weeks…

The Soul of Man Under Socialism, by Oscar Wilde

The chief advantage that would result from the establishment of Socialism is, undoubtedly, the fact that Socialism would relieve us from that sordid necessity of living for others which, in the present condition of things, presses so hardly upon almost everybody. In fact, scarcely anyone at all escapes.

Now and then, in the course of the century, a great man of science, like Darwin; a great poet like Keats; a fine critical spirit like M. Renan; a supreme artist like Flaubert, has been able to isolate himself, to keep himself out of reach of the clamorous claims of others, to stand “under the shelter of the wall”, as Plato puts it, and so to realize the perfection of what was in him, to his own incomparable gain, and to the incomparable and lasting gain of the whole world. These, however, are exceptions. The majority of people spoil their lives by an unhealthy and exaggerated altruism — are forced, indeed, so to spoil them. They find themselves surrounded by hideous poverty, by hideous ugliness, by hideous starvation. It is inevitable that they should be strongly moved by all this. The emotions of man are stirred more quickly than man’s intelligence; and, as I pointed out some time ago in an article on the function of criticism, it is much more easy to have sympathy with suffering than it is to have sympathy with thought. Accordingly, with admirable though misdirected intentions, they very seriously and very sentimentally set themselves to the task of remedying the evils that they see. But their remedies do not cure the disease: they merely prolong it. Indeed, their remedies are part of the disease.

They try to solve the problem of poverty, for instance, by keeping the poor alive; or, in the case of a very advanced school, by amusing the poor.

But this is not a solution: it is an aggravation of the difficulty. The proper aim is to try and reconstruct society on such a basis that poverty will be impossible. And the altruistic virtues have really prevented the carrying out of this aim. Just as the worst slave-owners were those who were kind to their slaves, and so prevented the horror of the system being realized by those who suffered from it, and understood by those who contemplated it, so, in the present state of things in England, the people who do most harm are the people who try to do most good; and at last we have had the spectacle of men who have really studied the problem and know the life — educated men who live in the East End — coming forward and imploring the community to restrain its altruistic impulses of charity, benevolence, and the like. They do so on the ground that such charity degrades and demoralizes. They are perfectly right. Charity creates a multitude of sins.

[To be continued, probably.]

Shit, I missed it

March 6th, 2004

Ireland 19: England 13. And this happening two weeks before I become eligible to become an Irishman, too.

Dead Socialist Watch, #77

March 5th, 2004

Josef Stalin, born 21 December 1879, died 5 March 1953.

The Mao of Pooh

March 5th, 2004

From yesterday’s Guardian:

“The Turtle has long been concerned with the education of our junior comrades,” proclaims the statement on the holding page. “Disappointed with the bourgeois drivel that passes for children’s fiction these days, a Turtle Collective has formed to combat the indoctrination of our youth with a series of heart-warming tales involving a bear, his best friend Christopher Robin, and socialism with Chinese characteristics.” The Voice of the Turtle is a witty, transatlantic online free-for-all of leftwing politics. Equally irreverent and militant, it has recently subverted Benjamin Hoff’s The Tao of Pooh - a subversion of A. A. Milne’s children’s classic - into a Maoist text. What might sound like a children’s book from indoctrination central translates to a witty example of fan fiction and a glorious satire of the children’s book in the spirit of Animal Farm.

Congratulations, Raj, on this smidgeon of recognition from the bourgeois press for your heroic labours on the Text of the Mao of Pooh…(Me, I just do an editing job on Raj’s draft. And add an average of about one joke per instalment.)

Nothing from me today…

March 3rd, 2004

So don’t hang around; head on over to The Onion for three instant classics, “Jesus Demands Creative Control Over Next Movie“, “Bush To Make Up Missed National Guard Service This Weekend” and “New Nietzschean Diet Lets You Eat Whatever You Fear Most” (already blogged by Belle).

Oh Noah / You go-a / All the way back to the protozoa…

March 2nd, 2004

Sarah wants to collect the worst rhymes in musical history, so follow the link and go and help her out.

I can’t, really, since the only Broadway show I know inside and out is the magnificent Oklahoma!, about which I can probably bore for Britain, but which has no bad rhymes at all.

The answer is blowin’ in the wind

March 2nd, 2004

Until April, at least. Because it’s normblog poll time again: this month’s poll is to harness the collective intellect of the internet — or, at least, the blog-reading bit of it — in order definitively to establish the identity of the best Bob Dylan songs that Bob Dylan ever wrote…

Well, it’s “Like A Rolling Stone”, isn’t it?

But there will, no doubt, be intense competition for the runner-up slots, and these not-quite-contests always generate good bloggerage. I’ve already dug my old LP copy of John Wesley Harding out of the back of the cupboard, and you can do the same (assuming that you have both an old LP copy of JWH, and a cupboard).

Get your entries in early and often — five choices each, 31 March deadline, email address here — and be a part of this month-long humanitarian intervention that will help to distract Norm from the contents of the Guardian’s op-ed page…

Dead Socialist Watch, #76

March 2nd, 2004

Marcel Liebman, Belgian Marxist historian, author of the Deutscher prize-winning book Leninism Under Lenin; born 7 July, 1929; died 2 March 1986.

I’m not sure there’s much on the web about Liebman, but you can read an article from a 1970 Monthly Review here.

And over on Planet Melanie…

March 1st, 2004

Melanie Phillips has just sat through Mel Gibson’s almost-certainly-appalling new film about the crucifixion of Jesus of Nazareth:

Most of the reactions have focused on the astonishing sadism and violence. Very few have seen fit even to mention the way it portrays the Jews as the real killers of the son of God…

Yup. That’s probably why a google search on “Mel Gibson” and “anti-semitism” and “Passion” taken together generates, um, over twenty-two thousand hits…

Distilled Nonsense

March 1st, 2004

Jamie, over at Blood and Treasure, has been reading the words of Paul “The Thinker” Richards on the honours system:

The overall impression is as if the Guardian had conducted a thought experiment in which a sufficiently medicated schizophrenic was offered a chance to set forth his vision of reform of the honours system, or if a number of linguists had elaborated a beta version of a means of back translation out of powerpoint. And it would be wrong to say that the article is unique. It’s more an exemplar of what passes for ideas formation amongst the managerial class as a whole, a distillation of the kind of nonsense spouted every day in local authorities, boardrooms, NGO’s and perhaps the newer of our less-esteemed universities.

Well, we disagree there. I’m reluctant to treat the scribblings of Paul “The Thinker” Richards as symptomatic of the thinking of an entire class, and prefer to personalise things a bit more. As Jamie and others have probably noticed…

Riot Re-Enactment

March 1st, 2004

Yes, I’ve linked to this before, but the London Riot Re-Enactment Society page still makes me laugh out loud, and it did again yesterday afternoon…

South Sea Bubble Riots, 1720
Hundreds of re-enactors dressed as failed investors will gather at the House of Commons to lobby MPs. When our pleas are ignored, re-enactors will then begin to attack individual MPs. We will only disperse after a third reading of the Riot Act.

The whole thing is brilliant. [Original tip-off from Simon, in his pre-silverdollarcircle days].

Oxford Graffiti

March 1st, 2004

Spotted on Longwall Street: “Hutton was Bollox” in a nice pastel shade, followed a couple of yards later by “Butler Will Be, Too”.

It’s not quite “Down with Marshallian marginalism!“, but I don’t think you get wall scrawl much like this in other towns…

Which side are you on, boys?

March 1st, 2004

England’s, or, um, England’s? Take the Supporter or Deporter? quiz, and see if you can visually differentiate between patriotic supporters of our national football team and, er, a bunch of racist thugs.

I scored seven, with a fine streak coming to an end after bollocksing up the last two; Uninformed Jason managed all ten; and Sarah, from whom I’ve pinched the link, got six. More scores, please.

The Bobblog vs The St Lawrence Republicans

March 1st, 2004

Bob Torres — whose Bobblog was the first blog I ever followed, and in some ways the inspiration for this one — has become the latest target of rightist attempts to mobilise the language of diversity and under-representation against academics who happen not to like the Republican Party and who occasionally say so. Go read.

Spamming Rosa

March 1st, 2004

A friend forwards happy news…

ROSA LUXEMBURG FOUNDATION/PRIZE AWARD DEPARTMENT,REF: NLM44125677 AND BATCH NO: 31/107/NL.

ATTENTION: Sir/Madam

RE/ AWARD NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to inform you of the announcement on the 2nd February 2004 of winners of the ROSA LUXEMBURG FOUNDATION LOTTERY WIN /INTERNATIONAL PROGRAMS held on 24TH JANUARY as part of our new year bonanza. You or your company, attached to ticket number 1416-4612-750, with serial number 3187-17 drew the lucky numbers 31-17-8-28-55, and consequently won the lottery in the “A” category…

And so on.Here’s the page for the real Rosa Luxemburg Stiftung…